Unwinding the Knots that Bind
By Elizabeth Scollan
Unwinding the Knots that Bind
I ran into a bit of a pickle putting up string lights the other day. They were brand spanking new and neatly wound around what looked like a toilet paper tube. It should have been childs play to unspool them methodically from the roll and across the surface of our counter, but I am particularly good at complicating simple tasks.
I must have pulled from the wrong end because halfway through the unspooling, the wire on which the lights were mounted was coiling around itself, bent out of shape and hopelessly tangled. I was half finished. I felt too far along to start the proper way and yet, the more I struggled with my error, the more acute the tangles in the lights became. This task of decorating that should have been delightful suddenly became a cross between a royal pain in the ass and a sinking ship whose life boats had already been deployed.
In a fit of embarrassing rage, I ripped what was left of the cardboard tube in the center, and slammed the remaining fairy lights onto the surface before stomping away like a kid throwing a temper tantrum. I left the jumbled knot of lights on the countertop too incensed at the moment to further address the knotted state of affairs and, to this day, it sits there.
To be fair from a distance, when the rest of the lights in the house are off, it actually looks quite lovely, offering a soft ambience that backlights the plants. It would take a discerning eye- up close- to notice the actual shit show. But I know the truth of the situation and every time I pass it, I cringe a little. If I had only taken a breath in the moment of realization and paused to lean in rather than double down, maybe the outcome would've been different.
Leave it to a menial task to shine the light of truth on life. Our physical and energetic landscapes are filled with these old pitfalls. The knots of dysfunction that we manage to twist ourselves into before we are at a loss for where to begin to untangle. Instead of leaning in, pausing and getting curious about it, we just keep moving forward. We think "A task for another day." And so the knot gets tighter until eventually the path it took to get this jumbled feels impossible to discern. So we just don't try.
My sister Katie, who is not only quite good at untying knots but actually enjoys it, (my mom used to give her a tangled necklace chain to unbind as a fun pastime) would say there are two keys to untying a tricky knot
Focus on where you think it begins. It may not be exactly right but it's a place to start. If you focus on the whole thing you are bound to get frustrated and quit.
Sometimes you have to lean into the knot. If you are constantly pulling or tugging you are depriving your knot of precious breathing room. Plus, if you exaggerate the shape of the bind you just might find another beginning.
Given her success rate, I'm going to say there's some truth to her method.
I venture to surmise that this same technique could be used when we are doing the work it takes to untie the physical, emotional and energetic knots of the body and mind.
How with patience, curiosity and precision, we can get to the source of the binding place.
How we can use the simple act of time and attention to unravel patterns of holding.
How sometimes we need to lean more deeply into our habit and get to know it a little better in order to understand how it functions and therefore how to move forward
How we can start at what seems like the beginning, for now, only to learn later, we need to go back even further.
I leave you with one of my favorite somatic movement practices. It's particularly good for unwinding traffic jams where the respiratory diaphragm and the psoas muscle both insert. This particular movement pulsates in and out of stretching and releasing the psoas muscle which runs from the inner leg all the up to the base of the back of the ribs. You might notice big gusts of breath, the desire to yawn, and a feeling of stretch or connection from leg to shoulder.
How to practice:
Lie on your back with both legs extended. Let your bones get heavy and let your body soften. Take a few breaths to be curious about whatever sensations you notice in your body.
Lie on your back with your right knee bent and the sole of your right foot resting on the ground. The left leg is extended. Bring your arms out to your sides in a 90 degree angle.
As you breathe in let the right knee swing in towards the midline so that your low back on the right side sways off the ground. Look towards your right hand.
.As you exhale return the sole of your right foot to the ground and the right knee face back up towards the ceiling.
Repeat 5-7 times pausing anywhere in the sequence that you are curious about the sensation. Stay deeply present to whatever sensations you notice as they arise.
Repeat for the left side. Notice what feels different from left without fixing anything.
Return to lying on your back and notice what feels new or different and notice what feels constant. Let your inner physician do their work!